Monday, May 05, 2008

It's That Time Of Year

Time to belly up to the exam table, assume the position and drop trou...

Had my annual physical this morning. My doctor isn't as attractive as the young lady above but I do go to a female doctor. My philosophy: if that procedure is going to be performed on me once a year it's going to be done by a woman (some of my friends laugh and say 'ah...small hands'. Nope, nothing to do with small hands, Sparky, it's more basic than that. Edge and Russ can probably figure out what I'm talkin' about).

Everything went well except, just a couple of things I have to work on. Cholesterol was 125...still really good but Triglycerides were too high. Too many carbs...going to have to lay off the Vito's Pizza. Also been having a bit of an issue with the 'boys' the last couple of months. Been having a twinge now and then from one side. Everything was OK as far as I could tell but the pain started suddenly back in March and hasn't gotten any worse or any better. Lifing or not lifting weights doesn't affect it any nor does riding or not riding the bike. When the Doc checked Lefty and asked me if there was any pain all was well. When she checked Righty I almost went through the roof...problem isolated. She said that since there wasn't any swelling or fluid buildup and both were the same size that it might be a mild hernia. I am scheduled for an ultrasound Friday...keep you posted.

I did learn, guys, that we are supposed to check the boys like women do their self-breast-exam. We are supposed to make sure they are both the same size (or at least not changing in size), there are no lumps on them or in the sack & check for sensitivity, pain and fluid buildup. Any change needs to be checked out immediately.'s permission to play with yourself.

Hmm...seeing how as men and women both have these self-exams they are supposed to do that couples should schedule a time to get together and help each other out...just a suggestion. Doctors orders.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Totally understand. I'm looking for a female doctor with long skinny fingers.

And that exam. I kind of hurts when you have 4 metal clamps on the tubes down there.

See ladies, you really do have it ok.


7:55 AM, May 06, 2008  

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